Crossland Manor




And now, some thoughts from Tad
the combo wine merchant,
talk show host and business mogul!

 

 

goodlook.wav....Tad:....Damn close with my rapier type wit, boyish good looks....and godlike body.....

peanut.wav....Tad:....I'm gonna roll a peanut from Pine Valley to San Francisco down Route 80....with my nose.....

ohlook.wav....Tad:....OH, look at this!...isn't this sssensational!....You know something?....With your coloring you should really stay away from Spring....you're really more of a Fall!

pantsdwn.wav....Tad:....It's not like you haven't seen me with my pants down....!

lipstick.wav....Tad:....Lipstick........When is red TOO red?...

ubetchya.wav....Tad:....Who ends up with it smeared all over my face?...you Betchya!....

proactor.wav....Tad:....I am NOT a professional actor....

food.wav....Tad:....wanna attract a man? Wear something that tastes like food!

wood.wav....Tad:....Well obviousy thee wood....has shrunk back down.....

banjos.wav....Tad's commentary on the results of cousins marrying cousins...

plabanjo.wav....Tad:....You don't play the banjo Do ya?....just wonderin"

joe-hoss.wav.....Tad:....Right now I got a date with Little Joe and Hoss...to get my neck broke.

dialjoke.wav....Tad:....What do I look like, Dial-a-Joke??

elvisite.wav....Tad:....I'm back in town five minutes..I find out you've had more sitings than Elvis!....

orsini.wav....Tad has the wine chilled and he's ready to party!!!


feedbag.wav....Tad:....Strap on the old feedbag and break open the champagne!(Tad's Toast)....

getitoff.wav....Tad:....It's not what you wear, but how fast you can get it off......

thnxjerk.wav....Tad:....I'll take that as a Thank You.....JERK!

faithful.wavTad: I can't be faithful to any one woman

pinevaly.wav....Tad:...."There's a reason people say home is where the heart is....and home....home is in Pine Valley....

makewavs.wav....Tad:....It's a small pond for such big waves.......

neuter.wav....Tad:....Well you could simply neuter me....call it a day......

cutedge.wav....Tad:....Welcome back to the Cutting Edge...

passout.wav....Tad:....Hope Erica gets back before I pass out....

lilabner.wav....Tad:....You and Lil' Abner gonna cut me some slack or do we have to do this the hard way?


naked.wav....Tad:....Just picture everybody naked!!

reputatn.wav....Tad:....a cyber romance....what would it do for my reputation??

online.wav....Tad:....Well it's time for an AM rondezvouz with a cybertomato.

romance.wav....Tad:....I offered you an afternoon of romance....and it's romance your gonna get!

ziffel.wav....Tad:....probably the way I did when I sold Dad's golf clubs to Arnold Ziffel in the 8th grade...

shave.wav.....Tad:....And I didn't even shave my legs this morning!

donation.wav....Tad:..."Well the truth for me is.....I don't do, hit and run sperm donations"....

observe.wav....Tad:....Observe infidele..as the Amazing Martini confounds the scenses and boggles the mind...Now ya see it....Edmund:..Now ya see it...

howstrix.wav.....Tad:....How's Tricks?!?..

wigglerm.wav....Tad:..."Wiggle Room!?!......Wiggle Room?!?.......

Gonna go out and find me some Wiggle Room......

sausage.wav...Tad:...I mean don't get me wrong....I bet the Sausage Festival....or whatever the hell they have around here, is a real barrel full 'o monkeys! ! ! ....

mazeltad.wav.....Tad:......Mazel Tov!........

mishagsh.wav....Tad & Adrian:....a lesson in Yiddish101...."Mishagash....Mishagash!?!....Oye gavult and vey is mear!....is that agency talk?!?"....

luvuguys.wav....Tad:...."I you guys!".....

dammit.wav....Tad:....Dammit!!!....

pigeonhl.wav....Tad:...."You've been in Pigeon Hollow Too long!"....

Our "Sweet Dixie Bird", havin' flown the Pigeon Holler Coop,
brings you some down-home dialogue droppings!

dixiedo.wav.....Dixie:..."You haven't seen my new Hairdo yet!"

fatnfire.wav.....Dixie:....I smell disaster like fat on a fire!

mysunshn.wav....Dixie with a heartfelt rendition of her theme song You Are My Sunshine....

shoeheel.wav.....Dixie:....You know this little empty space between your eyes.... thats just dying for the heel of a woman's shoe! ! !

buttout.wav.....Dixie:....Do me a big favor....butt the hell out....

dopylook.wav.....Dixie:....Why do you have that dopey look on your face?!?...How many bottles of champagne have you sucked down!?!?

coctail.wav....Dixie:....What is that coctail youre drinking?...

Is that like acid and champagne? ...some kind of first class trip you're on?

meaner.wav....Dixie:....You are meaner than a junkyard dog!

beinbed.wav....Dixie:....It's time for all the decent people to be in bed!

...Pigeon Hollow purity from houseguest Becca Tyree...

thebest.wav.....Becca:..."You're the best.....thank you for trusting me".....

grantyre.wav.....Becca:..."You know my Granny Tyree told me that....the closest she ever was to paradise was when she was in bed with her husband".....

snyde.wav.....Becca:..."Well.....did you think of anymore snyde comments to make?".....

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Please be aware that these pages are BIG! They contain .wavfiles and animated images, and the first time you visit, they will take a while to load. Please be patient. Thanks!

---Myrtle's Boardinghouse---Check in at Myrtle's!! Rae Cummings now has her permanent mailing address there, Gloria and Kelly Cole are the featured guests.

---Linden House---Time to visit the Diva Kane and her wise mother, Mona, with memories from 20 Adams Street.

---The Cabinet Of Dr. David Hayward---Do NOT bypass this page! Stop in for a check up with the number one heart healer in Pine Valley...and leave us not forget Mother...Vanessa, and her pretentious pratt Leo DuPres. On your way out don't miss Dr. David's Wild Ride, I'm sure he'd be delighted to drive you to any place your heart desires.

---The Loft ~ Lavery's Lair---Romanticize with Ryan inside his retreat for the for the lovelorn....Also known to some as "Wyan's Woom"....

---Wildwind---The Marick Estate---Let's go over by the river and almost through the woods to Dimitri and Edmund's mansion! Peggy, Princess Gillian, Eugenia, Alex and Maria also await.

---The Marick Mausoleum---For fellow fans of the late, great Hugo Marick....He now has his own page! Faithful servant Helga's found her final resting place here as well....

---The Chandler Mansion---Adam and Stuart's residence is filled with interesting bits and pieces...plus selections from Skye.

---Jackson Montgomery's Penthouse---The DA's resigned!! Pine Valley's court official turned court jester. Get an animated cyber kiss from Jackson, while you listen or load up some very entertaining sound wavs. Derek is there to give you a police escort back!....All approved....(or at least put up with)....by Walt Willey himself!....

---The Colby Holding Company---Marian and Liza, Dahlllings! Dramas and Traumas! Various comments from Marian who wants to hold a man, and Liza, who wants to hold the money! All in wav format for chatroom playback! They'll send send Shivers to your Elbows and Toes....Dahlllings!

---Wallingford Mansion---Feel free to frequent Phoebe's family and friends! Eloquent English expressions with Babblings from Brooke And Professor Langley's Language 101.

---1219 Hillcrest...The Martin House---A jigger of Jake, a jolt of Joe and a cup of Kelsey!

---The Dillon House!---Let's go see what Trevor, Janet, Harold, Amanda and the TimMan are doin'..

---Cortlandt Manor---Ms. Opal and Mr. Palmer are waiting to give you some down-home philosophy! Also staring Opal's off the record offspring....Adrian Sword and house guest Kevin adds some starry eyed thoughts.

---The Sounds Of Salsa---Your table is waiting as Hayley and Mateo welcome you to their very own nightclub!(formerly Holiday's)....and Sweeties....don't forget to join Arlene for a tall cool one at the bar.

---The Pine Cone Motel---Come visit the Pine Valley landmark, where the elite meet to cheat. Wil Cortland, Kendall Hart and Tanner Jordan are waiting for the other guests to arrive!! Before you check out, don't forget to visit lovely Willow Lake's forest of ovblivian, where we find parked...Esther's Trailer!"

---Front Street---Come on down to Front Street! Pine Valley's action area! Noah and Julia are waiting there! Belinda and Officer Taylor Cannon add a few comments....

---Pine Valley's VALLEY INN---The place and the guests are definitely classier than the Pine Cone! Among the current guests are "Roy....Mike Roy"....Nick Davis, Jeremy Hunter, Doctor Kinder and Paolo to make you feel rested and relaxed....plus, in a special Cameo Role, Dom Deluise!

---CYCLOPS!---Let us now walk through the shadder of the Valley Of Pines...if we dare, Fair Maids and Kind Gentlemen..where John Henry Rockerfeller alas Billy Clyde Tuggle awaits..it's a Real Blast...ya'll...! !

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